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Friday, July 14, 2006,1:10 PM

Hello everybody, feeling bored at work so decided to pen something down. Life hasn't been great for me and you know what I really miss RICE ! Its been 2 weeks since I last ate rice. I just cant dun know why. The thought of rice in my mind is enough to make me vomit. Rice + Sambal, oh how i hate them. And now I love curries. Funny how is it when you are expecting you tend to lurve things that you hate before. So I have been surviving on bread every single day. My mum has been kind enough to vary her cooking to suit me coz she knows that I cant take rice. Just like yesterday when I went to IMM for my dinner, this couple sitting beside us was eating mee goreng. The moment I 'terpandang' the mee goreng, i nearly vomitted. Gosh, what is wrong with me. I haven't put on much weight. Last Tuesday went to see my gynae and my weight is only 49 kg. Pathetic isn't it, coz I haven't been eating much. Basically I do not want to eat, I have no appetite. It was hell for me. Dizzy spells, nauseousness its killing me. Baby be good to mummy okay. Dun give mummy so many problems. Mummy need to work, find money, lotsa them so that I can feed you, clothe you and provide you with everything.

Got to go now, tons of work piling. ~ShahFendi~


Saturday, July 01, 2006,9:44 PM

I am finally expecting. Joyous occasion for my husband but me ? I don't know. Looking forward for it actually but now with the giddiness, nauseousness and my abdominal pains I don't know. I'm like bedridden and all I want to do is sleep I'm okay when it comes to going to work but the moment i am home then all these things will haunt me. I'm worried coz I have been having abdominal pains which my friends and colleagues says they dun have it in their early months of pregnancy. Is it normal ? Whenever my abdominal is painful, I would rub my tummy and whisper to my baby not to give me trouble. Please baby, be good, do not give mummy trouble.

I'm in emotional turmoil now. I feel sad most of the time, nothing and nobody can make me happy. I am back in the state to where I was a month before I got married. If only I listened to my heart........Or maybe I am feeling lonely.

Its been long since I blogged. The other time I went to Tioman with my baby, it was fun. Haven't got the chance to download all my pix yet. On Thursday i went to visit Fawcett's mum with Ita. She is very ill and we all we were worried for her. I really hope she will recover fast.

I really do not have the mood to write anything more. That's all for now. Bye. ~ShahFendi~